There's this writer.
She sits in her attic room
staring at her blank pages
questioning the non-exsisting words.
the invisible skrawl penned across
white lines.

What's wrong with this picture?
what happened to this girl?
what makes her question the unknowing?

"it's the world"
She'll say with distant eyes.
but why?

The fight was over
before it began
So whats the problem?

That girl,
is me...

I'm here to apologise.
I feel like i've cracked open.
turned a new page.

So everyone can stop worrying.
I've seen my mistakes and everything had been set right.

All I can hope is that I try and set everything right again and all my friends will be there to set me up on my new path.
I'm going to need you guys' help with this.
you all know how i can be,
your guidance would be most helpful.

I love you ALL!
know that!
your opinions matter the most to me.

Kisses Lovers!!
I'm off to start a new life.
(again)

I don' think...
i've ever felt more shitty in my life then today.
I'm not going to go into details.
All i'm going to say is it started out beautiful and simple.
HOt hot and complicated,
then turned into a burning disaster.
I'll admit it was my fault,
and i shouldn't have let things go as far as they did.
but i didn't...
and it got out of hand...

I hate my self.
as cliche as that sounds.
it really is.
i've never hated anything more than i hate right now.
there is a pit in my chest that is just screaming at me.

I wish there was a way to go back and change it.
weeks ago,
never meet him,
never ask her.
I want it to change.
I want to bleed....

Someone kill me before I do.

GRRRR!!!!
i'm pissed.
freaking Spirit of Halloween called me in to work and I couldn;t feeking go cua it was at the same time i have to go to work for Taco Bell!
it's bull!
like i call in and they don't have any hours for me and then they call me two hours before my shift to make sure I was comming in.

"Oh, i'm sorry i can't go in today, i'm sick of your bull shit hours and Taco Bell pays better AND gives me atleast 2 shifts a week. Not to mention i don't get costumes and cokes thrown at me at Taco bell. Nor do i get obsinities yelled at me, I don't have to dress up like a 5 foot banana!"

god i wish i could lash out like that.
I just want to quit.
News flash for Spirit,
if you ask me to work on Halloween,
you can think twice bitches!
(>.<
if they don't give me hours then i'm not going in for Halloween.
screw that!
I've got plans.

not to mention, i went in last week...
NO!
two weeks ago (mind you I haven't working at Spirit since then) to get my pay check.
and there were ATLEAST 3!
count them, 3
new kids that I've never seen before.

I've worked at Spirit since the begining.
8 hour shifts every day for atleast a week.
getting the store ready for opening.
not to mention I volenteerd to work opening day,
and volenteered to make a fool out of myself and wave a sign as a banana.
ON MY SISTER'S BIRTHDAY mind you!!!

For Taco Bell, I have yet to do anythign embaracing.
I did slip...
but that wasn't my fault.
I'm hard working and am crazy enthusiastic.
So,
where are my hours!?!?

You all know that photography is my life.
I'm always talking about sites,
new ideas,
new poses,
and other various ways to reinvent myself.
But I'm terrified when it comes to taking pictures.

As some of you know,
My senior pictures at today at 2.
and I cannot express how scared I am!!
My heart is going a thousand miles per hour.
And i've been ranting and raving about if it rains today I'll kill someone.
(becuase I'm doing the whole shoot outside! (^^))

Wish me luck.....
I'll need it.